| Mediating your divorce allows you and your | | | | attorneys or former judges with extensive |
| partner to consult with an unbiased third-party to | | | | experience in family law so they are |
| help work out the details of the split. The | | | | knowledgeable about court proceedings as well as |
| "unbiased" part is important because it ensures | | | | the specific laws of your state. Locating a good |
| that both you and your partner are getting a fair | | | | mediator is often as easy as asking your divorce |
| deal. | | | | attorney or contacting the Court Clerk's office to |
| This often generates a feeling a cooperation | | | | see if they have a list of approved mediators |
| between the parties and makes the divorce | | | | they can recommend. You can also look to |
| negotiations much less stressful on everyone | | | | trusted internet directories and family law yellow |
| involved. | | | | pages for help identifying mediators in your area. |
| Mediation also removes the emotional need to | | | | Mediators can tackle all aspects of divorce |
| prove fault as you're no longer there to "win" the | | | | including child custody, spousal support and |
| case. Instead, you're both looking to dissolve your | | | | property distribution. Once an agreement has |
| marriage in a relatively amicable manner. This is a | | | | been reached, it can be submitted to the court |
| great benefit if you tend to shy away from | | | | for approval and, assuming that the judge agrees |
| confrontation as traditional divorce proceedings | | | | that your settlement is fair, your divorce would |
| can quickly get very ugly very fast. | | | | then be on its way to becoming final. |
| To decide if mediation is the right step for you, | | | | To get the most from the mediation process, |
| you'll need to talk to your spouse openly and | | | | you may want to spend a little time meeting with |
| honestly. If both of you are in agreement about | | | | a few different mediators to find one that |
| the divorce, mediation could easily be the obvious | | | | matches your personalities as closely as possible. |
| next step. | | | | This isn't to say that a mediator will agree with |
| If, however, one of you feels resentful or | | | | everything you or your partner say but you |
| betrayed, you may need to discuss the matter | | | | should feel that your mediator has both of your |
| further to see if you can reach an agreement. | | | | best interests (and those of your children) at |
| Mediation is not binding, so, in order to really get | | | | heart during the proceedings. |
| your money's worth, you'll need to both agree to | | | | This part of the process is important since having |
| set your differences aside in favor of mapping | | | | the right mediator can mean the difference |
| out a fair arrangement. | | | | between achieving an amicable divorce and |
| Mediators are typically counselors, therapists, | | | | heading off to court to fight it out. |